homepage
the project "book"

1st oct, 2025

God said: "stop praying, I gave you everything"
time to limp out again, a believer.

6th oct, mon, 2025

be easy, it's all already lost

4th oct, sat, 2025

of this one thing I'm sure:
don't share the sadness with those that do not have the cure

25th sept, 2025

if you asked for sunlight that i don't have,
i'd spend the entire next decade microwaving moonlight

>>>>
nobody cares about your grief.
you deserve nothing. be a relief.

21st sept, 2025

thoughts in the vector space.
every piece of armor was in place.

8th sept, monday, 2025

when i all but disappear,
seek me here.

8th aug, thursday, 2024

keeping a clear mind,
but who could clear that thing.

6th of february, 2025. a thursday.

i spilled myself like sand.
the decade didn't go as planned.
i finally have time
to sit and understand.

6th of aug, tuesday, 2024

you're messing up my mile time
you're ruining my genre by being a part of it
there is no limit to how deeply you've inconvenienced me.


>>
>>
for how much i pray for you,
you have ruined my religion.

25th sept, 2025

tomorrow's for sorrow.
tonight we write.

24th of june, a monday. 2024

disappear me,
disappear me all in all,
dissipate me in the wall.

>>
>>


>>
>>

i start every day by letting god know that im not condoning any of this,
im thouroughly dissatisfied with his work, looking for a fight, and full of energy.

26th may, sunday

i poured him onto me like water.
he didn't love me, it was gravity

1st may, 2024, wednesday.

i'm like a buffalo,
every part of me gotta get used.

xx/yy/202z

I'm big like easy, you're big like bamboo

19th sept, 2025

peace will not feel like a hottub.

29th april, again, a monday.

i took one, but two disappeared.
i realized as i drew nearer,
i took the one against the mirror.

6th mar, 1am, wednesday (2024)

y'all make me want to cry.
i've seen the way you misquote the dead,
made me never want to die.


27th fev, tuesday (2024)

look at me, dear.
do your best, dear,
at all costs...
resist the urge to rot.


15th fev, a thursday (2024)

god sends me the bill,
then god pays it.
every plan i have,
god spays it.


date unknown, but it may have been a tuesday (2014-2024)

wretched beasts,
i am the sun!
the sun!
the sun!

26th jan '24

this flesh keeps spreading,
and thats not what flesh is for,
the only thing that fits me,
is the floor.


25th jan '24

something ripped in me,
and kept ripping,
i felt fear in me,
and kept gripping,
i kept running home,
and kept tripping,
i was groping the truth,
truth kept dripping.
i keep trying to lie still,
but keep flipping.



xx/yy 2023

the clean, the written,
like us, the smitten;

the cold, the blind,
lead us, the kind.

have a toothache,
have a headache,
i wont mind.

>>
ideas came like a gust of wind,
and my entire mind became a hallway.

feb 8th 2024

little belly,
full of jelly.
night comes to collect you
but the bronx protects you.
out of history,
all in mystery,
hidden, liminal,
little criminal.
new and old appraise you,
all around amaze you.
little darling round and warm,
untouched by big little storm.
little medicine pouch
could make edison slouch
could make grandfather dance
could make elephant pants
sees with eyes closed
smells with wise nose
little nonsense, little laugh
little do a little math
little coming
to the tree
blessing little
you and me.


feb 6th 2024

i made a round...
didnt like what i found,
saw nothing i liked,
disliked nothing, too,
nothing here, nothing new,
not a single new sound.
nothing ever really happens does it?
i keep making rounds.


31st jan '24

the people i've let near me,
people i cant stand,
it gives me chills to think...
of who has held my hand.


>>

30th jan '24

how do i explain
to working men?
to men that have made lives,
and driven cars,
and graduated children,
men,
that i am not...
how do we call it?
men.
how do I explain... that my dog and i don't drive,
what do u call them, again?
men.

23rd dec '23

keep a clear mind.
achieve maximum sensitivity,
exhibit maximum control.
develop patience for filth,
and faith in the filthy.
become undeniably utile,
pay attention,
let go of the littleness of life,
and do not despair.


>>
now that we're not that good,
not all that young,
not hardworking,
not particularly kind or easy to talk to,
not very honest,
nor a person of principle,
not a very reliable or loyal person,
not rather patient,
not very present or good looking, or calm,
not exactly a model citizen,
or a good daughter
or a friendly neighbor,
or a hero,
...i guess its time to write.


>>
im flat, im ruined, im gone
im fully bored.
dont scratch.
dont telephone.
go to no doctors.
write.
i wouldnt eat if i were you,
but i know you will,
its alright.
leave the dishes for the girl,
and write.

>>
as always, write.
i know you spent 33 beautiful years
trying to find some way to be a carpenter or a plumber
or some other kind of useful man,
but now that its so clear,
that purpose isnt coming,
write.
stop abusing men,
dont even look at them,
stop altogether,
write.


4th oct, sat, 2025

on what foundation? on your own?
out here walking home alone?

march 2024

im mad about the work i pursue,
mad at what a bad job i do,
i asked for guidance,
and i heard silence.
god's bad at his, too.


12th jan '24

where a man should have been,
stood an idea in a hat.
i asked it what its doing here,
but hats dont answer that.


>>
of all the things that matter,
and all the things that don't,
i saw life shatter,
when i realized you won't.


27th dec '23

ever late night wander,
out there on your own?

28th sept, 2025

if you have no experience with liars and thieves,
please don't start with me.

28th dec '23

how could i get the flu?
i meditate every day.

15th oct, '23

sometimes i feel like im a little spider
and other people are a huge rocky cliff,
and i just climb all over them in the sun.
but i want to be a rocky cliff, too,
i want to be crawled on in the sun.


31st oct, '23

a prayer from 10,000 years ago:
"lord hear the prayer of this neanderthalis,
rid me of desire,
my brain has become large."

16th fev, a friday

if you're prone to nightmares...
you and i may get along!


18th mar, whenever that was, 2024

i looked at you in disbelief,
when you told me youre one of me,
...but everything you say is perfect,
every movement is respect
to everything calm, and everything correct,
i'll watch you do forever,
do and do again,
no way youre from
where i am from,
you must be one of them.

december '23

i reach for you but youre like air.
i breathe for you, but youre too everywhere.
i try to see you but you are my eyes,
i pray for peace from you,
but youre surprise.
i ask for love from you when i despair,
but why ask for love, when love is always there?

i hide from you but youre my hiding spot.
i tried so hard to remember...
and there you were when i forgot.

youre blocked by me in the reflection,
youre silence when i need attention,
youre noise when i seek out your peace,
youre calm when i require heat,
im scotland when youre london time,
youre late when its beginning time,
youre all of you when im all mine.
i look for you in your house but youre the walls,
im signing papers and youre laughing in the halls.
i look for you in your name,
but youre between the sounds,
i look for you in your eyes but youre the thing that looks,
i try to track you in your thoughts but thats not you,
thats things you read in books,
i listen for you in your words,
but youre the deed,
i look for you in satisfaction,
but you are the need.
i grab you by your flesh, but youre inside,
i look for you at work, but youve retired.

i'm always just one step behind,
and thats when you remind,
"my lack is only in your mind."

maybe im wrong,
maybe youre gone,
maybe looking for you is just where i belong.



oct 2023

Vultures like flies,
Like the clock always lies,
Like the 1 trains sing,
Like the bagels we bring,

Like a pancake my mind
flips like a fish, the day dips
like a lemon into water
like nothing at all

if it all incinerates and burns,
If the clock the tide turns,

Maybe its brooklyn, maybe its me.
I was on my way, but the lives of others
lay their path through me.

Be a russian, be a good jew,
be a financier, a loan shark,
if theres one thing i've noticed:
no one will mind
Be ancient, be graceful,
be a mammal afterall
instead of falling for andrew,
i should've walked into a wall.


29th april, monday.

dark are the days that lie awake.
night are the days that you forsake.
light are the ways that feel your wake.

sometime late 2024

1. history will swallow us like we're the holy roman empire
2. The jaws of time will pull themselves over our horizon, close shut, and the future will laugh at us using our own mouths.
3. We'll be remembered first begrudginly, then inaccurately, then symbolically (only used to carry metaphors and prove points we wouldnt agree with), and then barely at all.
4. And finally, when all our distant children are done using our rotted flesh as jackets, and done misquoting us, disgracing us, raping our memory..
5. ..then! When we'll have begged to be forgotten, when being forgotten will seem like a peaceful rest compared to living on as a disfigured memory..When they are done shooting semen through our decomposing eyes and wearing our once cherished anuses as trinkets and status symbols
6. when they are done using our names to defend points serving their ego...it is THEN we will discover... perhaps obscurity is not that bad. Perhaps it was the ego that wanted to live forever.. and as always, when the ego dines and dashes, it's the soul that pays the egos bill.
7. Maybe then we will remember what we always knew.. there's no real value in being unique or original. Being rare doesn't make us a treasure. After all..if being healthy, of service, and ALIVE! is common... then call me the common man!


Lorem ips